█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓ ▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓ ▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░ ⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░ See the child. He is pale and thin, he wears a thin and ragged linen shirt. He stokes the scullery fire. Outside lie dark turned fields with rags of snow and darker woods beyond that harbor yet a few last wolves. His folk are known for hewers of wood and drawers of water but in truth his father has been a schoolmaster. He lies in drink, he quotes from poets whose names are now lost. The boy crouches by the fire and watches him. // Night of your birth. Thirty-three. The Leonids they were called. God how the stars did fall. I looked for blackness, holes in the heavens. The Dipper stove. // The mother dead these fourteen years did incubate in her own bosom the creature who would carry her off. The father never speaks her name, the child does not know it. He has a sister in this world that he will not see again. He watches, pale and unwashed. He can neither read nor write and in him broods already a taste for mindless violence. All history present in that visage, the child the father of the man. // blank space to follow






 ____  _  _  ____  __  ____  __ _  __  __ _   ___    __  _  _  ____ 
/ ___)/ )( \(  _ \(  )(  __)(  / )(  )(  ( \ / __)  (  )( \/ )(  _ \
\___ \) __ ( )   / )(  ) _)  )  (  )( /    /( (_ \   )( / \/ \ ) __/
(____/\_)(_/(__\_)(__)(____)(__\_)(__)\_)__) \___/  (__)\_)(_/(__)
--- =-.'*+--=--=--+*'.-= --- 
      /     \   
     /       \  
    /         \ 
   /   _____   \
   "-."     ".-"
    .         . 
    : `°   °' : 
     \ v._.v /  
      ":---:"   
  :    |   |    
 /;\  -;___;    
;  \`/ |   |    
    "  )   (    
     ._;   ;_.
she hits me

--- =-.'*+--=--=--+*'.-= ---
VOL+ PLAY/PAUSE AUDIO -VOL

--- =-.'*+--=--=--+*'.-= ---
return
blank space to follow // At fourteen he runs away. He will not see again the freezing kitchenhouse in the predawn dark. The firewood, the washpots. He wanders west as far as Memphis, a solitary migrant upon that flat and pastoral landscape. [LINE REDACTED.] A shadowed agony in the garden. Against the sun's declining figures moving in the slower dusk across a paper skyline. A lone dark husbandman pursuing mule and harrow down the rainblown bottomland toward night. // A year later he is in Saint Louis. He is taken on for New Orleans aboard a flatboat. Forty-two days on the river. At night the steamboats hoot and trudge past through the black waters all alight like cities adrift. They break up the float and sell the lumber and he walks in the streets and hears tongues he has not heard before. He lives in a room above a courtyard behind a tavern and he comes down at night like some fairybook beast to fight with the sailors. He is not big but he has big wrists, big hands. His shoulders are set close. The child's face is curiously untouched behind the scars, the eyes oddly innocent. They fight with fists, with feet, with bottles or knives. All races, all breeds. Men whose speech sounds like the grunting of apes. Men from lands so far and queer that standing over them where they lie bleeding in the mud he feels mankind itself vindicated. ░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░⠀░ ▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░▒░ ▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓▒▓ █▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓█▓